I'm Worth It
by Victoria Sugden-Barton
Summary: When sexy, rich Enzo St. John catch of the town get's with the geeky girl next door Bonnie Bennett, whose mother is now married to his father. Everything changes for their family.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

 **Had a crazy idea for Bonnie and Enzo fic, smutty goodness because we can't have enough of that. Leave a comment if you like.**

* * *

Now I've had her, I couldn't get enough of her. This had never happened to me before. Usually once I pulled out of a woman, I was done. I'd get my gear back on and leave as quickly as I could without being rude.

With Bonnie though, I wanted to stay. I wanted to breathe her in, feel her softness melting into me, look into her gorgeous eyes. Make love to her stunning body. Stay inside her all night long.

I wanted to captivate her mind and her heart just like she had mine.

She hadn't argued when I told her I was the man for her.

"Oh, Enzo." Her voice was raspy and full of emotion. Her eyes softened and she pulled me down for a kiss. Gentle, but the passion in her lips couldn't be mistaken.

Did it mean she agreed? Would she let me be her man?

I sucked her lower lip into my mouth. I didn't want to think of the implications of that statement, but I had no doubt in my mind that it was true.

But first I had to take care of her. I rose from the bed and padded to the bathroom. I found a washcloth, ran it under the hot tap and wrung out the excess water.

When I returned, Bonnie had turned onto her side, hugging a pillow.

"On your back, sweetheart. I need to clean you up. Be a good girl for me."

She smiled shyly as she turned and spread her legs. My cum seeped from her pussy and onto the sheets. Gently I wiped between her legs, kissing her thighs as I finished my task.

"Thank you, sweet Bonnie," I whispered, nearly choking on the words. It was the most precious gift any woman could give a man.

Her eyes shone brightly as she nodded her head.

I lifted her naked body into my arms and made my way to the door. She was my woman now.

Bonnie slipped her arm around my neck. "Where are you taking me?"

"To my bed. So I can take care of you properly."

She sighed contently against my chest.

"Thank you. I'd like that." She planted a soft kiss in the crook my neck. God, even that one small act made my dick harden again. It wanted inside of her, it couldn't until she was ready, but it had too.

"I'm going to hold you and cuddle you while you fall asleep in my arms. Would you like that?"

"Oh yes," she said, her smile growing wider. It made me happy to take care of her and I loved that she wanted it too.

I kicked the door open and with the help of the moonlight filtering through the open window, I lifted the covers and placed her gently on my bed. Opening the drawer of the nightstand, I found anti-inflammatory painkillers and shook two from the container. I fetched a glass of water and held it out to her.

"Take these, sweetheart. Will help you sleep better."

"Thank you, Doctor," she teased.

She sat up and did as instructed.

"Such a good girl," I said as I leaned in and kissed her. I had to hold myself back from going to town on her and sucking on those luscious nipples that were clearly happy to see me. "Fuck, have I told you how gorgeous you are?"

Giggling, she lay back against the pillows. "Only a thousand times tonight. I might just start believing you."

"Believe it," I said. "And my cock agrees." I shook my stiffened dick at her. "See what you do to me?"

Her eyes widened as much as her grin. "I do that to you?"

"You sure do, baby. If my cock had its way, it would be inside you all night long."

She chuckled softly and held her arms out to me. I crawled onto the bed, eager to feel her naked skin against mine.

Skin to skin. Sexy as fuck.

"Turn around, baby. I'm going to put my arm around you and you're going to get some sleep, okay?"

"Okay," she said as she yawned.

Her ass backed up against my dick. Fuck, how was I supposed to sleep with a raging boner? Curling into her, I caressed her skin and kissed her neck, savoring the moment and the woman.

Despite my worries of not being able to sleep with her naked body enticingly close to me, I drifted into a peaceful sleep. I hadn't felt this content and at peace in a very long time.

I wanted Bonnie in my bed.

I wanted to fuck her until she couldn't walk.

I wanted this for the rest of my life.

* * *

The first rays of the morning woke me as the sun filtered through the window. Where was I? Memories of last night flooded back to me. I'd had way more to drink than I normally consumed, so I wouldn't be surprised to find it was all just a surreal dream.

I opened my eyes, slowly adjusting to the daylight.

It was true. I was naked in Enzo's bed and his arm was still draped around me, his hand cupping one breast and his erection throbbing against my ass.

Sweet Jesus.

What if someone found us like this?

But even worse, what would Enzo's reaction be when he woke up and realized what we'd done? Would he be horrified and disgusted? I couldn't bear it if he regretted it. I turned slowly so as not to disturb him and looked at his face up close while he was still asleep.

I studied his handsome features. The small bump in his otherwise perfectly straight nose. The laugher lines by the sides of his face. Worry lines etched into his forehead and I longed to stroke gently over them with my fingertips. His thick dark eyebrows and long black lashes rivaled my own. The morning stubble adorning his strong jaw made my pussy clench. He was so . . . manly. What wasn't to love?

Unable to resist touching him any longer, my index finger traced lightly over the arch of the cupids bow defining his mouth. How I loved kissing those damn lips.

His hand drifted from my breast and came to rest between my legs. One long finger found its way to my clit, slowly rubbing in small circles. Good God, was he doing this in his sleep? I bit my lip so as not to make a sound when all I wanted to do was groan out loud and spread my legs so he could get to other parts of me.

"Bonnie?" His voice was deep and croaky and his eyes still closed.

"Yeah?"

"Hi," he breathed as he slowly opened his eyes and met my gaze, the corners of his mouth twisted upward.

"Hi," I whispered back.

"You really are here. For a minute I thought it was just one of my dreams."

Enzo dreamed about me? Really?

My heart swelled with joy. I wasn't the only one having inappropriate dreams. It pleased me to know that somewhere inside Enzo was thinking of me the same way I thought of him.

"Yeah, I really am here. In your bed." Naked and horny.

As if he read my mind, his erection—which had pretty much been pressed against my ass all night long—throbbed against my back.

"God, you feel so good. I'm never letting you go." His low, husky voice made me go all soft and gooey.

Yeah . . . until the real world takes over.

Either Enzo was still drunk or he was talking in his sleep, because clearly he hadn't thought this through. His eyes were still closed and a wicked sexy smile had spread over his face.

He started nibbling on my ear sending shockwaves of pleasure straight to my core. I wanted him so much that my whole body ached for him. If this was the last time I could be with him, even if he was doing this in his sleep, I wanted it. Badly.

* * *

I couldn't believe Bonnie had stayed the night. I expected to wake up with a hangover and an empty bed. I wanted more of her, so much more that my cock ached to get back inside her.

Knowing I was the first man to fuck her made me happy me beyond words. But I also wanted to be her last. Now that I'd tasted her, been inside her, I wanted everything.

I didn't want to think.

Thinking about the real world was scary as fuck. I didn't know how to make this work. All I knew in this moment was that letting her go and pretending nothing happened between us would break me in fucking half.

How could something that felt so right be so wrong? In the eyes of the world, we were family, even though we weren't related by blood. Dalton St. John would never allow a scandal to rock the share prices of his empire. He'd made that abundantly clear on several occasion when he'd fired prominent members of top management for overstepping the line.

I shuddered to think what his reaction would be if he found out about this. About us. Bonnie was like one of Dalton's own daughters. He'd fucking kill me for taking advantage of her vulnerability.

But, a lifetime without this, without her in my bed, would be torture. How could I pretend I didn't want her for myself when she consumed my every thought? If I had to stand by and watch her get involved and marry somebody else—God forbid, a man like Lockwood—it would rip my fucking heart out.

There had to be a way. I was smart. Somehow there had to be a solution.

But right now, my dick was doing all of the thinking for me. Throbbing like a motherfucker, it wanted inside her sweet pussy. She was already slick and wet, her pussy swollen and ready from my touch alone.

I kissed her ear and then her neck.

"Bonnie, I want you so bad," I said, unable to keep my wicked thoughts to myself.

She turned to face me, slipping her arms around my neck and pulling me close to her chest. She smelled so good that I breathed her in. I rested my head between her breasts for a long moment, my eyes closed, just drinking in the sensation of peace and love surrounding us.

"I want you too," she said simply as she presented her lips for a kiss. I kissed her deeply and even her morning breath was sweet. I worried that I still tasted like the scotch I'd overconsumed, but it didn't seem to bother her. She kissed me with so much gusto that it set me alight and all I could think about was her.

"God, you're sexy," I groaned as I pushed her hair back off her face. Her eyes pulled me in and it felt like I could see right into her soul. I wanted to drown in her beauty. I kissed both eyelids, then her nose, her lips and then worked my way down her body. I wanted to map every inch of her with my mouth.

Sliding down, I sucked a plump nipple into my mouth. My tongue flicked and my teeth grazed the sensitive bud until she groaned.

"Good girl." I smiled against her skin. I loved hearing her appreciation of what I was doing to her. It turned me on knowing she was taking pleasure from my actions.

My hand drifted back to her slick pussy, testing her wetness. Jesus, she didn't disappoint. Her legs parted without me asking, giving me access to her core. One finger slipped inside. Not wanting to hurt my girl, I waited for her reaction.

"Like that, baby?"

She curved her back, bucking her hips to get closer. "Hmmm, yes. More please."

God, she was so responsive. It drove me fucking crazy. Two fingers fucked her slowly, stretching her for my cock. I wanted her to feel nothing but pleasure this time.

I sucked and lapped at her tits as I kept stroking her pussy. My balls wanted to burst and my cock was desperate to slam into her, but I knew I had to go slowly. I settled myself between her legs, running my hard cock along the length of her pussy, mixing our juices to lubricate us both.

"Ready, baby?"

Her legs clamped around my waist and she pulled me closer to her.

"Yeah. Oh yeah," she sighed dreamily, "so ready."

I found her hands and laced my fingers with hers again. I'd never done this before with another woman, yet I wanted that strong connection with Bonnie while we fucked. She squeezed my hands, letting me know it was significant for her too.

My dick inched its way inside her slowly, gently. She felt so damn good. Warm and slick. Perfect for my cock.

I stared into her eyes. "Hi."

The corners of her mouth turned up into a shy smile. "Hi."

Slowly I built up speed, built up pressure. My eyes wanted to roll back in my head from the feel of her, but I forced them to stay open. I wanted to see her face when she came.

For a split second a cloud glazed over her eyes. Something made her sad. But it was gone as fast as it had come and left me wondering if I'd imagined it. I loved taking it slow with her, worshiping her body with mine, feeling her beneath me and responding to my movements, matching me stroke for stroke.

"Enzo, I'm so close. Your . . . um, your cock . . . it feels so good inside me." Her cheeks warmed, yet she didn't look away. It was sexy as fuck.

"Come for me, baby. Grip my cock with your pussy. I want to feel you clench around me."

Sweet little Bonnie loved my dirty talk. Her pupils dilated until her eyes were almost completely black.

"Oh God," she cried. "Enzo!" Her pussy swallowed me up to the balls and I felt her tighten as her orgasm ripped through her.

That was all I needed to come hard inside her.

This woman. She was everything I had dreamed of and more.

She was my heart's desire.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:**

 **Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the reviews and followings. I was told that this weekend is the start of bonenzo week so everyone get ready for that on Saturday. The Vampire Diaries premiere is next Friday very excited for that. So read on and leave a comment.**

* * *

Still naked, I wrapped a towel around my body before I snuck out of Enzo's room and back to my own. The rest of the household were bound to wake up soon, so I tiptoed quietly across the hallway, holding my breath until I reached my bedroom.

A few moments later, I pushed the door closed and leaned against it, smiling when my gaze fell on the blood stained sheets.

Thank God I said no to Tyler. He was mad as hell that I'd turned him down, but I had to follow my gut instinct. No amount of explaining on his part could make me feel better about what he'd planned. Even after he'd asked me to be his girlfriend, I couldn't help but wondered if it was because he thought that was the ticket to getting inside my panties.

I was going to give it all to him, even without being his girlfriend. Tyler was the one who screwed it all up with the stupid bet. Although I was initially angry with Enzo for spoiling my plans, it was the best thing that could have happened to me.

It couldn't have worked out any better.

But what now?

There was no way this could work in real life. We couldn't sneak around fucking one another under our parents' roof for the rest of our lives.

The irony wasn't lost on me. I'd always wanted a brother like Elena had. So when Mom told me she was marrying her boss and I would be getting one, I was more than pleased even though he would spend most of his time away in London. Now he was about to graduate and would be moving closer to home and I had to admit nothing could have made me happier. As much as I loved Virginia, I'd missed spending time with Enzo. He made me laugh and he stimulated my mind—he was exactly the kind of guy I wanted to marry one day.

Staring at myself in the mirror for a long moment, I looked for signs of any changes now that I was no longer a virgin. It was still me, but with a glow on my cheeks I'd never possessed before.

I wanted Enzo.

 ** _My brow knitted together. How is this going to work for you, Bonnie?  
_** **  
Enzo is family.**

It can never be. As much as I wanted it, I couldn't wave a magical wand to alter our situation. An ache settled in my heart.

I dropped the towel and ran a bath, pouring a copious amount of bubble bath into it. The fragrance of lavender and honey filled the room as steam rose into the air. I climbed in slowly and slid down, succumbing to the warm water that enveloped my sore muscles. Leaning back with bubbles frothing around me and covering every inch of me to my chin, I let out a long slow breath.

Deep breath in.

Long slow breath out.

And then another.

Until the ache subsided.

I'll deal with reality later.

At that moment all I wanted was to bask in the glory of what had happened between us. The magic that weaved around us. The spark that ignited my soul.

I couldn't deny the magnetic pull Enzo had on me any longer. I wanted to give into those feelings and just experience the magic for a little longer.

Hell no, I'm lying. I want the magic forever.

I closed my eyes and replayed everything in my mind. From the moment I'd come down the stairs, to the last kiss before I crept out of Enzo's bed.

A slow grin spread across my face as it dawned on me that Enzo had been jealous all along. And there I was thinking all he was doing was being a protective big brother.

My hand caressed down my ribs, recalling the feel of his touch against my skin. Touching my pussy, I remembered the feel of Enzo's mouth. God, I loved those wicked lips and tongue giving me pleasure. It was sexy as hell that he liked tasting me too.

It felt tender but oh so good between my legs. I'd never imagined sex would be this amazing or that I'd want it so much.

Lost in my thoughts, still touching myself everywhere Enzo had been, my head jerked up in surprise and my jaw dropped slightly open when the door creaked open.

"Good morning, Bonnie. Why are you up so early and what are you smiling at?" Virginia stuck her head around the door. "Um . . . can I come in?"

"A knock would've been nice. You can't just barge in here."

Virginia raised a brow.

"And why not? It's not like you have a guy in here, right?" She pushed the door open and walked in anyway.

"Close the door," I said, half irritated.

"Sorry! It's just that I can't wait to hear what happened last night. Tyler looked so damn hot. Did you have a good time? Did you get to have sex?" Her words flew out of her mouth, as if she couldn't talk fast enough. This girl has no filter.

"Jeez, young lady, you sure ask a lot of questions."

Her eyes narrowed as she studied my face.

"What?" I asked as her stare became more intense.

"There's something different about you this morning. I bet you had sex!"

"Well I sure as hell didn't." I heard as Elena came through the still open door.

"What the hell is this? Did I miss the memo about the meeting in my bathroom?" I squealed. "I think I'll have to lock my door in future."

Elena stood with her hands on her hips. She didn't look all that happy.

"What's wrong, Hon?" I asked. Elena was one of those people who always had a smile on her face. Something serious must have happened for her to be here this early with a frown marring her beautiful face.

Elena turned to my step sister who had planted her ass on the stool and was watching us as if she were at the movies.

"Um, Virginia, honey, would you mind fetching us a coffee each? Pretty please?"

"And miss all the juicy parts? You're kidding, right?" She smirked. Missy was getting way too big for her sixteen year old shoes.

"Well unless you want to hear details about your brother—" Elena said dryly.

Oh shit. She wanted to talk about Enzo. How the hell was I going to pull that off after what happened last night?

"Oh hell no. Spare me that conversation. Two coffees coming up. And I'll take my time, okay?" She pushed to her feet and left the bathroom, this time closing the door behind her.

Elena came to sit on the edge of the bath and ran her fingers absentmindedly through the frothy bubbles.

"Bonnie, I don't understand what I did wrong. I really thought Enzo was into me, but it turns out he isn't."

I sucked in a breath.

"What makes you say that?"

"Just the way he acted. Don't get me wrong, he was the perfect gentleman—most of the time. Come to think of it, he disappeared for a while and left me alone without any explanation. I wonder where he went?" The frown between her perfectly sculptured brows deepened as she tapped her finger to her chin.

I didn't say anything. If I kept quiet long enough, she'd soon fill the silence.

"I asked him if there was someone else. His actions would make sense if he were in love with someone already."

My eyes widened.

"What did he say?"

I didn't know if I wanted to hear her answer. What if it wasn't what I wanted to hear? But what if it was? I was screwed either way. I sat up in the bath, waiting for her reply.

"Funny thing . . . he never gave me a real answer. Said it wasn't me and that any man would be a fool not to like me. Then he said he'd prove it by taking me to dinner sometime this week."

"Oh. Right." My stomach performed a sickly flip.

"What I can't understand though is that I practically threw myself at him and he didn't even notice or make a move. I was so open about what I wanted, but he didn't try anything."

"He didn't?" My voice was small and scratchy because my throat had tightened so much.

"I'm sorry, Hon, I know this must be awkward for you talking about your stepbrother like this, but I need advice on how to get him to fuck me." She looked like she wanted to cry, I felt horrible. "I think I'm falling for him, Bonnie. I've never wanted a man so badly."

Usually men fell over themselves, practically tripping over their dicks to get to my best friend. I could understand that this was a strange experience for her. Just as strange as me suddenly having two guys chasing after me. Okay, maybe not quite chasing, but still . . .

"You want advice from a girl who last had a boyfriend in grade school? What the hell do I know about these things? I'm probably the last person who can help, Hon." Ain't that the truth.

"Thing is, I'm sure he really likes me. He kissed me a few times and it was amazing. I want him, Bonnie, and you've got to help me get him."

Sweet Jesus. I was in so much trouble. How could I deny my best friend? What would she say if she knew what happened between me and the man she wanted. She'd hardly believe that he'd want me over her.

We were both out of our depths and Enzo was slap bang in the middle of this dilemma.

* * *

"Can I stay for breakfast? I'm hoping to see Enzo. Will you help me with him?" Elena asked, sitting on my bed as I begun to get dressed.

I pulled a t-shirt over my head and combed my wet hair. Thank goodness I got rid of that fancy hairdo when I washed it. I was back to the old me—with highlights- plain Jane who didn't stand a damn chance against a beautiful woman like Elena.

"Hon, you'll get more information from Cosmo or Google than me. I don't have a clue how to get a guy." I couldn't help the bitterness that stuck into my voice.

Enzo was drunk last night. I was now pretty sure that was the only reason he wanted me. That, and the fact we were both half naked to start with. Shame washed over me as I recalled how easily I fell for his charms.

How could I have thought for even a moment that something could come from having sex with my stepbrother? Of course it couldn't. I had to face reality: I was the ugly stepsister.

"Oh my God, here I've been rambling on about my situation and I haven't even asked you how you went with your guy. What happened with Tyler? Did you get your cherry popped?"

How to answer that without telling lies?

I lowered my eyes. "Tyler didn't quite work out. Turns out I was only a bet to him to prove his manliness."

"Oh God, Hon, I'm so sorry. I've never really liked Tyler . . . or his military older brother. That one just gives me the creeps with the way he fucks me with his eyes. Mason Lockwood was so intense, he scares the shit out of me." She shuddered to prove her point. "What you need, is a man like Enzo. Someone who is considerate and kind . . . and fucking hot. Hmmm, I wonder where we can find you someone like him."

I nearly choked on the coffee Virginia had brought me.

I didn't want a man like Enzo. I wanted Enzo.

But what I wanted and what I'd get were two vastly different things.

Feeling sick to the stomach, I told Elena, "You go down to breakfast. Mom and Virginia will be happy to have you. And maybe you'll see Enzo too." I rubbed my temples. "I still have a hangover. I'm going to crawl back into bed and sleep some more, okay?"

"Okay. If you don't mind. Hope you feel better soon. Wish me luck!" She called out in a singsong tone as she walked out of my room.

"Luck," I mumbled, feigning enthusiasm.

Luckily I'd changed the sheets and made a fresh bed before everyone barged in on me this morning. I lifted the bedding and slid between the cool sheets. My body was on fire as shame burned through me. How could I ever face Enzo again? How could I look at him without giving away how much I wanted him?

I was so screwed.

Just as I was about to drift off to sleep, I heard voices and footsteps walking toward my door. A soft knock and Enzo's concerned voice made my stomach lurch. Then I heard my mother's voice and Elena's. Why couldn't they just leave me the fuck alone so I could drown in sorrows and have my own little pity party?

"Honey, are you okay?" Mom sounded truly concerned as she lay her hand on my forehead. She always did that when I wasn't feeling well. "You feel feverish. Lucky for you Lorenzo is home. Let our doctor take a good look at you, sweetie."

I groaned and buried my face in the pillow. Really?

Feet shuffled closer to the bed and then a cool hand lay on my shoulder.

Refusing to look up at Enzo, I mumbled into the pillow. "Go away. I'm okay. I just have a damn hangover and I need some sleep."

"Ouch, she bites this morning," Virginia said. Trust her to have some smartass comment.

"Bon, love. Look at me," Enzo commanded.

Shit. I was powerless to disobey him when he called me Love with his smoky British accent.

I turned my head to the side, mostly because I needed to breathe, but refused to open my eyes. I couldn't look at him after everything Elena had said. The aroma that was uniquely Enzo snaked its way to my consciousness. God, he smelled good. Just as good as he tasted.

Jesus. Why am I thinking these wicked thoughts?

I squeezed my eyes shut and wished them all away. How had I gone from sheer ecstasy to having this dull ache in my heart in just over sixty minutes?

"I told you she wasn't feeling well," Elena said. "Let's leave her be and get back to breakfast. I'll draw the curtains so she can get some sleep."

"That's a good idea," Enzo said. "The darkness will help for her headache."

My heart felt as heavy as a rock. He wanted to leave so he could be with Elena. I got the message loud and clear. She was beautiful—he'd said so himself. Of course he wanted to be with her now she was here.

I hate feeling like this.

"Tell you what, you guys go down and finish breakfast. I'll stay here with Bonnie and give her something to make her better."

"But, Enzo—" Elena sounded pretty unhappy with his reply.

He laid a hand on my forehead for a few seconds, then pushed my damp hair behind my ear.

"Go now, ladies. My patient will be better in no time, I promise." The tone of his voice was even and measured, not inviting arguments.

As soon as everyone left and the door closed, he leaned over and kissed my brow. I couldn't believe how that one simple act made me feel so much better so quickly, but I kept my eyes shut. I was never good at hiding my feelings and if Enzo looked into my eyes he'd see just how messed up I was.

Without a word, he left the room and instantly I missed his closeness.

God, how was I going to ever get over him and act normal?

The door squeaked again and I felt his presence return to the room, restoring some calm inside me.

Click.

He locked the door?

"I brought two painkillers and a glass of water. Sit up, Bonnie." He was using his Doctor voice now. It was strong and commanding, laced with tenderness and a dollop of caring.

My heart did a little flip-flop. I did as I was told and took the tablets and water without directly looking at him and yet from my peripheral vision I could see how damn hot he looked in his workout gear. His biceps bulged as he crossed his arms over his fine chest.

I swallowed the tablets and drank all the water. I was so damn thirsty.

"Good girl."

He took the empty glass from my hand, his fingers grazing mine. Every touch was like magic and torture rolled into one.

"What's going on, Love? Are you mad at me about what happened?"

Say what?

I found my voice, but still avoided his gaze despite feeling his eyes burn into me. My cheeks grew hotter.

"N . . . no, of course not."

He let out a long sigh, as if he'd been holding his breath. He sat at the edge of the bed and took my hand in his. I squeezed my eyes shut and savored his touch. With his thumb he rubbed small circles on my wrist, sending an electric current through my body.

"I'm so sorry if what happened last night was not what you wanted. I can never give it back to you and that's just killing me."

The caring in his voice caught me off guard. I never expected this. My eyes flew open to witness a pained expression on his handsome face. I'd never seen Enzo so distraught.

Oh God, was he regretting having sex with me now he was sober?

Of course he was.

Because like most males he'd be worried I'd want something more that he wasn't willing to give, like a relationship when all he'd wanted was to blow his load and forget about it.

This was awkward as hell.

Nausea swept over me. I bowed my head and closed my eyes again. Pain throbbed at my temples and tears prickled behind my eyelids. I wish he wouldn't be so damn nice, but then again this was Enzo. On some level he did care about me, I'd always known that, just not in the way I wanted him to. It would've been so much easier if he was just a jerk about it and didn't apologize. His kindness was making my heart hurt even more.

He took my chin between his fingers and raised my face. His voice cracked as he spoke.

"Open your eyes, Love, so I can see you."

I couldn't. My lids felt impossibly heavy, like they stuck together with superglue.

"Please, baby," he whispered.

Oh My God. Baby? Why would he still call me that?

The tears I'd been fighting so hard spilled from my under my closed eyelids and rolled down my cheeks.

"Fuck. What have I done to you? Please forgive me, Bonnie." Both hands cupped my cheeks. I pressed my face into his touch, relishing every second. His thumbs brushed over my cheeks, wiping the tears away. My throat burned with unspoken words.

"I wish I could undo last night so badly you have no idea. I'm so fucking sorry."

He regretted last night.

I want to die.

I wanted to tell him how much I loved him. I wanted to beg him to love me back. I wanted him to hold me and never let go.

Instead I sat there leaning against the headboard, my head pounding and my heart splintering into a million pieces.

Enzo pulled the covers back and I felt his weight as he settled onto the bed.

"Don't say anything, just lie down. I'm going to hold you until you fall asleep, okay?"

I nodded and slid down until my head hit the pillow. Enzo settled down and spooned me, holding me close to his chest. An avalanche of tears feel from my eyes being this close yet so far away from him.

He stroked my arm and kissed my hair.

"Shhhh, Love, shhhh. Be a good girl and go to sleep."

What was in those tablets he gave me? Drowsiness overtook me and my body sank heavily into the mattress. I clutched his hand and laced my fingers through his, pressing them to my heart. A few minutes later my breathing evened out and I drifted into a deep sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:**

 **Back at it. Holy Fuck last night's episode was wonderful. I love the storyline the writers are going with Bonnie and Enzo, they remind me of an early years Stelena and Forwood. RIP Tyler Lockwood.**

* * *

When I woke what felt like hours later, I felt so much better. The headache had lifted and I could think clearly again. Enzo must have left as soon as I'd fallen asleep, but I could still smell him on my pillow and sheets. I inhaled deeply, savoring it so I could recall it at will later when I knew I'd need it.

I slipped out of bed and pulled my messy hair into a ponytail. The princess from last night was well and truly gone and I was back to practical old me. Yet I felt different. Older.

Making my way down the stairs, my stomach rumbled. The clock in the hallway chimed three times. No wonder I was starving, I'd slept the best part of the day away.

Noticing Dalton's car in the driveway through the large windows, I wondered if he was getting ready for a business trip. Usually he only came home during the day if he had to pack to fly off somewhere. Quite often he had to jet off to one of his branches to sort out the crisis of the day.

If Dalton was going away, I wanted to at least say goodbye. Instead of heading for the kitchen, I made a left turn to his study. As I drew closer, I heard his voice booming down the hallway.

"For the love of God, I can't understand why you want to be a doctor when you can be my right hand man. Who would turn down the opportunity to run a billion dollar business?"

As I drew closer, Enzo's voice traveled toward me, sounding uncharacteristically loud.

"Uh . . . that would be me."

Oh shit. Not this argument again. I didn't know if there would ever be a happy solution to their ongoing feud. It was hard for me to hear because I really cared for my step-dad, but I completely understood where Enzo was coming from. If I'd been forced into a career I loathed I'd be equally as resentful.

I froze just outside the doorway. It felt rude to just walk in on them and I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but I couldn't help overhearing their conversation. Enzo had already told me parts of the arguments, but they usually didn't make a scene in front of the family. Their clashes were kept private—even to my mother.

Dalton's grave tone of voice floated toward me.

"Lorenzo, you have until your twenty-fifth birthday to get your shit together. Then I'm bringing you in, like it or not. The deal I negotiated with your mother during our divorce has taken a heavy toll on our company. You should've been on the Board of Directors by now, learning the ropes. I don't want to keep flying to the mines to sort every damn crisis out. I'm getting too old to deal with this crap."

There was a long silence before Enzo cleared his throat.

"Obviously Mum understands where my passion lies, that's why she negotiated the six year reprieve for me." He couldn't keep the bitterness from his voice. "Staying in London with her was the best thing I have ever done. I'll never regret it."

Dalton's voice was ominous. "Well that's all changing in the next few weeks. And while you're working on your future, I think it's time you find yourself a pretty wife and settle down too. A good wife is crucial to a successful man."

"Are you being serious right now? First you're forcing me into a career and now this? I'm not getting married—ever. I decided that a long time ago. Listening to you and Mum fight every night can have a bad effect on kids, you know." Enzo sounded incredibly pissed off.

I didn't know if I should be happy or upset about him never wanting to get married. At least I wouldn't have to get a voodoo doll of his wife. But a part of me also felt sad that he thought like that.

"I really like that Elena Gilbert girl. She's very pretty, intelligent and she comes from a great family. I think she'd be a perfect match."

"Jesus, Dad, when did you get so bloody jaded? Getting married isn't like a damn business deal."

Dalton snorted. "You wanna bet? Anyway, I invited Elena to my birthday party in two weeks. I kind of implied that you'd be her date. I think the two of you'd make a perfect couple and she seems to be smitten with you. You have my blessing to pursue a relationship with her."

Enzo let out a long hiss. "Dad, you're taking this way too far. This is the twenty first century, I'll choose who I date."

"Stop being a stubborn asshole, Lorenzo. The girl is perfect marriage material. Don't let her slip away. Bed her while she still has stars in her eyes." Dalton chuckled. "You don't need me to teach you how to fuck a woman too, do you?"

"I'm not even answering that question," Enzo huffed. "And I wish you'd stay the hell out of my personal life. Sometimes I wish I weren't born a damn St. John."

"You don't mean that—"

"You wanna bet?" Another snort.

I hated when they fought like this. They were two good men—if only they could get on the same page.

"Anyway, I have a damn plane to catch. Hopefully it's the last time I'll be doing this . . . next it will be you. But don't disappoint the girl, bring her to my fiftieth party as your date. The sooner you marry her and produce heirs, the sooner you can settle down and take over St. John International. I want to retire in five to ten years. I need you ready by then."

A knife twisted deeper into my already splintered heart.

"If it will make you happy, I'll bring Elena because I don't want to hurt her and you've already set this up. I agree that she's an amazing woman and would be a great wife."

I stumbled away from the doorway. I couldn't listen to any more - not that I should've heard any of it. Learning that Dalton wanted Elena as his daughter-in-law should be good news, right? She was my best friend after all and Dalton was right—she would be perfect as Enzo's wife, but it hurt.

And then Enzo agreed. My heart ached so damn much that I had to rub at it with the back of my fist. He deserved the best and Elena could give him everything he could possibly want.

Only, I could never watch the two of them together as man and wife. It would kill me slowly but surely watching Enzo with her and imagining them making love. I just couldn't do it.

My appetite had completely disappeared, with heavy feet and heart I climbed the stairs back to my bedroom. This time I made sure to lock the door so that nobody could interrupt.

I reached for my phone. I knew what I had to do. I had the perfect plan.

* * *

Why couldn't my father understand that while business was his passion, it wasn't mine? Since I was knee high, I'd wanted to be a doctor. And that remained true throughout my school years.

Time Magazine had recently written an article about me titled "The Reluctant Billionaire". They couldn't be more right. I hated glitz and glamour and all the bling, shiny shit rich people seemed to attract wherever they went. I wanted a simple life with a woman I loved, in a career I was passionate about. Was that asking too fucking much of life?

More pressure from Dad and his Board of Directors to get into the goddamn family business was having the opposite effect on me. Besides, I wished he'd realize that I'd suck at running his empire. Not because I was incapable or incompetent—I'd been a straight-A student all my fucking life - but what he wanted for my future was the polar opposite of what I wanted. There simply wasn't a solution to the problem.

I ran my fingers through my hair. "But just so you know, Elena's not the one for me. So quit trying to force me into a relationship with her. I'm not getting married remember?"

"Don't be daft. If you don't get married it will present all kinds of problems and start viscous rumors and you know how I feel about those."

As usual when I had this kind of discussion with Dad, my head started pounding. I rubbed my temples with my thumbs to try and alleviate the pressure.

"Frankly I don't give a fuck about what other people think. If people want to think I'm gay, let them, I don't have a problem with that. Your and Mum's divorce caused quite stir, so I think you're being unfair expecting everyone else to not cause rumors."

He loosened the tie around his neck and pulled at his collar. "I nearly lost St. John International over that scandal. Your mother running off to London to become a fashion model with her fucking gym instructor nearly ruined everything I'd sacrificed so much for. That's when I took a vow to never put our company under such intense pressure and jeopardize everything like that ever again."

Suddenly Dalton St. John looked his age. No, he actually looked older. I noticed how shallow his skin was and the dark circles under his eyes. He even had a slight yellow tinge to his complexion.

"Dad, when last have you had a decent rest? You're pushing yourself and everyone else way too hard."

He stopped pacing the room and sat on the edge of the desk facing me. His shoulders slumped forward and his voice had lost its hard edge.

"I'm tired, Son. I need a break but I don't have faith in anyone else to run the company. Everyone has their own agenda. That's why I'm so desperate for you to join me . . . so I know the company is in the hands of someone I can really trust."

Now that he'd put it that way, I felt like a complete asshole for fighting him so hard about it. As much as I wanted to please him, I couldn't relent, so I changed the subject.

"Dad, you need to have a check-up, okay? Have you ever had your liver function tested?"

"Do I look like someone who has time to go to a doctor? I barely have time to wipe my ass, never mind going through blood tests and all that crap."

I cleared my throat. "You've made it abundantly clear what you think of the medical profession, but I'm worried about you. Since I'm going along with your plans for Elena and your birthday bash, I want something in return from you."

Dad threw back his head and laughed, it was a deep sound that traveled all the way from his belly.

"See, you're a natural at this negotiation business. I'm not having any more of your bullshit—in five weeks you'll be initiated into St. John International and take your rightful place alongside me. In return, I'll get whatever goddamn tests you want me as long as you set the appointments up through Valerie so there aren't any clashes in my schedule."

Worry gripped my insides, afraid that if I didn't give in and become part of the business, my father would keel over one day and I'd blame myself for it. Since I'd detected the jaundiced tone of his skin, I'd also noticed on closer inspection that the whites of his eyes were also a shade of yellow.

"Okay. It's a deal. I'll call Valerie in the morning."

I sighed, long and hard. I felt like the whole world was closing in on me. The only two people who understood my passion for my work were my mother—who was virtually impossible to reach these days—and Bonnie.

I needed to speak to my stepsister. She was always able to ground me in a way no one else could. She'd help me make sense of everything in her calm and logical way and I'd have to tell her about my date with Elena. I wanted her to hear it from me.

"Dad?"

"Yes?"

"I hope you haven't invited that Lockwood kid to your birthday party?"

"No, I didn't," he said as he grabbed his jacket off the back of the chair. Before I could heave a sigh of relief, he continued, "But Abby did. She invited the whole family because she and Carol Lockwood are in the same tennis group. Your stepmother is planning a huge damn party, even though I told her I don't want a big fuss."

"Fuck."

"What's your issue with the younger brother? He seems all mad about Bonnie and you know how shy she is about dating. A push in the right direction may just lead to something more. Maybe you and Bonnie could have a double wedding, huh?"

"What?" I spluttered, "Don't be crazy. You can control your company and even control what I do, but stay out of our relationships. I thought you said you don't have time for anything else?"

"I want grandchildren before I die, Lorenzo. I want to know that there is a line of heirs ready to take over the St. John Dynasty after you. Make your old man happy and get married soon, Son. It would be the best birthday present you could give me."

"Jesus, Dad, I'm only just turning twenty-five. You've got to stop pushing so damn hard."

"I don't know what it is with you young people these days . . . why you are so damn afraid of commitment."

I huffed. "That's not true. I'm committed to my career . . . as a doctor. I've worked my butt off for six years to be the best I can be. Why can't you see that?"

Frowning, Dad looked at his watch. "I'm running late. Think about everything we've talked about. I'll be back in a week and a half before the party. Please help Abby with whatever she needs. You know how she can get carried away trying to make it special."

I hated big elaborate parties as much as Bonnie did, but Abby? She thrived on organizing big events that people would remember years later. "I'm sure it will be spectacular. You knew she was an event organizer before you married her, so what do you expect? It's what she does."

Dad picked up his briefcase and took a few strides toward me.

"Don't tell Bonnie, but Abby has arranged for a huge surprise for her too since she refused to have a twenty-first birthday party."

"Well her birthday was during her final exams. I don't blame Bonnie for not wanting a fuss made." I shrugged.

Gripping my shoulder, Dad squeezed me hard before he hugged me with one arm.

"I'm glad you're back in the States. Enjoy your last few weeks of freedom, because I'm going to work your arse off." He patted my back. "I need to run. I've still got to find Abby and say goodbye."

My dreams were crumbling around me.

I was ready to hop on the next plane back to London. It wasn't the prospect of hard work that frightened me, it was how trapped I felt as my father's world came crushing down on me.

If only there wasn't something big holding me back.

Bonnie.

I couldn't leave without her.

* * *

The whole house seemed to be one huge buzz as Mom engrossed herself with organizing Dalton St. John's party.

"I want to make sure this is the best event I've ever put together. Dalton has done so much for me over the years, I want this party to be spectacular, something he'll always remember."

The sparkle in her eyes was testament to how excited she was and having an open checkbook didn't hurt either. As the wife of one of the wealthiest men on the East Coast, Abby St. John had become accustomed to the finer things in life, things she would never have been able to afford before marrying Dalton.

"Well, if judging by the number of people that have been in and out of this place in the last few days, it seems you're planning to upstage the Queen of England."

She placed her hands on her hips and studied me for a moment before laughing as she shook her head.

"You always exaggerate, Bonnie. But you've just given me another idea. The Queen, huh?"

"Oh God, Mom, I didn't mean it literally. You know Dalton said he didn't want a huge party. I think what you have going on here is already on a grand scale. Don't get too carried away."

"Too late," Virginia said as she bounced into the kitchen. "This is going to be the party of the decade. I've seen some of the plans, and let me tell you—"

"Virginia, shush. Let's not spoil it by giving too much away, okay." Mom winked at her as if they were sharing a secret. It never ceased to amaze me how Virginia always managed to have inside information about everything. She was sharp, smart and very curious.

Mom tactfully changed the subject. "Have you figured out what you are wearing to the party yet, Bonnie? You'll need something pretty."

I rolled my eyes. "Ugh, no I haven't. Do I really need a cocktail dress? Can't I just wear the same one I wore to the ball?"

"Don't be silly. I swear you are the only woman I know who hates buying a new dress. You'd better go shopping with Virginia or Elena, because I expect you to look as beautiful as you did for the ball. Dalton deserves the effort."

"Elena already has a new dress. She's so excited to be coming as Enzo's date that she rushed out after breakfast to get it," Virginia informed us.

The blood drained from my face. This was getting real—Enzo and Elena. How did he feel about it? I didn't even want to think about it, let alone talk about it.

"I know. She called me straight after Dad invited her." I tried to not sound grumpy, but I wasn't sure I was successful. Elena being Enzo's date was doing my head in.

I busied myself by getting a bowl and filling it with muesli. I took great care in slicing strawberries and bananas on top before finishing it off with a dollop of Greek yogurt. Virginia and Mom carried on their discussion about flowers and music and everything else related to the grand party.

Feeling more and more like a stranger in my own home, I took my bowl out to the garden. I always felt so much better when I was outdoors and I just couldn't stomach all the chirpiness around me anymore when it felt like my world was falling apart and I couldn't even tell anyone. Not my best friend, not my mother nor sister. And definitely not the man causing this affliction.

"Bonnie, there you are," Enzo's deep voice reverberated through me. "I've been wanting to talk to you. Can I sit down?"

"Sure," I said, avoiding his gaze and keeping my eyes glued to the large mug in his hand instead. "You really are addicted to caffeine. You of all people should know that it's not good for you."

He gave me a boyish grin. "I know. But of all the evils in the world, it's probably one of the better one. And if it makes you feel any better, there are other things I'm more addicted to than caffeine."

"Oh, really? Like what?"

"This is going to sound real cheesy."

"Try me."

He cleared his throat.

"I'm addicted to your smile . . . and the way I feel when I'm around you. That's a ten on the cheesy scale, right?" He laughed. I loved the way his eyes crinkled at the corners. "Maybe eleven?"

"You could've been a songwriter," I teased, not really knowing how to take that or what the correct response was. My mind was blank. Damn, I needed lessons in flirting.

His rich laugh helped me relax a little. I loved the sound of it because it came from a place deep inside that couldn't be faked. I noted that he didn't push for an answer.

Still smiling, he said, "You've chosen my favorite spot out here. Whenever I need to think I always sit here."

"Funny, so do I."

"What are you—" we both blurted out at the same time. His gaze captured mine and held it as he pulled his hand into mine.

"Bonnie, let's not be awkward around one another, please." His eyes glistened. "It's difficult enough as it is, don't you think?"

A lump had formed in my throat and I found it impossible to speak so I simply nodded my head.

Enzo's expression turned serious. "I have an idea."

The way his eyes turned bright and dimples appeared in his cheeks took my breath away. Enzo's ideas were always really, really good.

"Yeah?" I replied warily, not wanting to give away the fact that my heartrate just sped up to Mach one proportions.

"Let's go to London for a few days." His voice was even and if I hadn't noticed the small tick of his jaw, I would've thought he was joking.

"London?"

"Yeah, consider it a gift," he drawled lazily. "I've been wondering what to get you for your twenty-first and graduation. A week in London together would be amazing, don't you think?"

He watched for my reaction from under his impossibly thick, black lashes.

"Why London?" I asked, buying time to work through my surprise.

"I have a few things to tie up at Oxford, it seems like Dad isn't doing to back down from the deal and let me be a doctor." His expression suddenly saddened. "I want to tell my professor in person that I'm not coming back to complete my pediatric studies. It's only fair since he put so much effort into teaching me and helping me get the scholarship."

I swallow hard. Watching the pain on his face was killing me. "You got a scholarship?"

So damn proud of him and yet hurt that he hadn't told me earlier, I chewed slowly on another mouthful of muesli. Enzo didn't need a scholarship, but working hard enough to earn one would be his way of proving his worth.

"I did. Didn't want to use my parent's money for my education. The plan was to pay it forward when I qualified by setting up a few more scholarship for future students." He sighed heavily before taking another sip of coffee. With a sad voice he added, "But that's not going to happen for me."

Suppressing the urge to take his face in my hands and kiss him, I put down my spoon and bowl on the garden table and placed both hands under my ass to keep them from doing something silly. We'd spent hours in the past talking about our dreams and ambitions, being anything other than a doctor would slowly kill Enzo from the inside. How could any parent want that for their child? Especially someone as naturally gifted as Enzo.

"You've always hoped you'd be able to sway him when the time came. I'm so sorry—"

He shrugged. "I had a less than five percent chance of convincing him. I was always knew that, but I don't regret a single minute of my training. Hopefully it will come in useful at some point in my life." He laughed, but there was a touch of sadness to it that pulled at my heart.

Silence fell between us as we both withdrew into our thoughts. It wasn't always necessary for us to talk when we were together, neither of us felt the need to fill the quiet with meaningless chatter.

Watching him out of the corner of my eye, I noticed how his shoulders had slumped forward ever so slightly. It wasn't like Enzo to let life get him down. If only there was something I could do to help him.

"You haven't answered my question." He brushed the hair that had fallen over his brow out of the way as his penetrating gaze settled on me. I studied my nails as if I'd never seen them before.

"Why?" I asked simply.

"Why? Because I want to be with you. Since that night I can't think of anything else but you in my arms. All I'm asking for is seven days. Seven days of only us. Away from everyone and everything."

There was nothing I wanted more. It was a chance for a piece of heaven on earth but it also sounded like a recipe for getting my heart broken beyond repair. I bit into my lower lip. I was so damn tempted to throw caution to the wind and follow my heart.

"What about Elena?"

"Huh? What about Elena?" His brow knitted together in confusion, as if I was speaking in a foreign language.

"Dalton wants you to date her. She's your date for his party." My voice was calm and matter-of-factly, even though my mouth became dry at the thought.

He pulled a face. "I only agreed for two reasons. One I didn't want to hurt Elena's feelings because he'd already invited her, and two, I'm worried about his health. It was a trade—he promised to see a doctor if I agreed to his plans."

"I'm confused, Enzo. What good will spending time with me do if we have to sneak around? How would we pull off going to London together without raising questions?"

The confident grin he gave me was proof he'd thought this through.

"No sneaking. I'll go ahead of you to Oxford for a few days. You meet me in London three days later. Besides, can't a brother treat his dearest stepsister for her birthday? Seems perfectly legitimate to me. What do you say?"

So it was going to be a purely platonic trip? Disappointment coursed through my body. I wanted more . . . so much more. But maybe it was better this way.

I took a deep breath and squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. I'd do anything to have seven days alone with Enzo, in whatever shape they took. We'd been platonic for years, I could do it again, even after the best damn night of my life.

"Okay. I'm in," I said as I expelled a long breath. Lord help me.

"Thank you, Bon. You won't regret it. It will be the best week of your life." His voice was as smooth as honey and his eyes shone with promises he didn't articulate. I couldn't help but clench my thighs together at the thought of collecting on those unspoken promises.

Oh God, why did I want him so damn much that it physically hurt?


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note:**

 **Can't believe it's been since November since I've updated. So so sorry about that you all. I'll try to update weekly from now on, I'm working on the fifth chapter right now. Anywho I was missing Bonnie and Enzo in the last episode so here you all go.**

* * *

Virginia had begged me to watch the latest episode of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills with her and we were both stretched out in front of the television eating pretzels. I'd rolled my eyes so often in the last half hour that I was developing a damn headache already. I shifted around on the couch, feeling guilty sitting there instead of doing something more productive with my time. Years of studying hard meant I didn't watch TV often, and if I did, it certainly wasn't that kind of program. Every now and then Virginia let out a Oh-My-God or what-the-heck, and I couldn't help chuckling at how seriously she took the show.

My phone rang and I glanced at it casually because I wasn't expecting a call from anyone in particular.

"Hello, Bonnie speaking."

"Miss St. John?"

"Yes?"

Very few people called me by my adopted surname unless it was a stranger or the media.

"I'm Detective Donovan from the Mystic Falls Police Station. We need to talk to you please. Can you come down to the city office this afternoon?"

I drew in a harsh breath. What would the police want with me? I'd paid the parking fine from a bad parking decision at college ages ago. And who exactly was we?

"Um . . . sure I can, but what is it about? Are you sure you have the right person?"

"You are Bonnie St. John?"

"Yes, that's me." Hadn't we already cleared that up?

"You work at the downtown rehab center?"

Cagey, I answered, "Yeah. Does this have to do with any of my patients?"

"I sorry but I can't say anymore until you get here. Can you be here by five this afternoon at the latest?" It was more of a command than a request.

Glancing at my watch I saw that it was three already, I couldn't wait another two hours. "I can get there in the next hour."

"Even better. Maybe you can bring a friend or family member with you?"

My blood instantly ran cold. "Why?"

"It's just a suggestion, Miss St. John, but it's up to you."

I scribbled the address he gave me onto a piece of paper. This was scaring the shit out of me and even more so because I had no idea what it was about. I knew the person on the other end of the line was only doing their job, but did they have any clue as to how upsetting it was to get a call like that out of the blue and not be given any real information.

Virginia gave me a quizzical look. "You look pale. What's wrong?"

"Um, I just got this weird phone call. I have to go to the police office in the city. They want a word with me."

"Really? What about?"

"I wish I knew. It was a strange conversation and it's freaking me out. I'm thinking it must have something to do with one of my patients, but he wouldn't give me any more information until I got there."

Still clutching the piece of paper I'd written on in my hand, I grabbed my car keys from the counter and headed towards the door.

"I'm going to see what it's all about. Be back soon."

"Can I come with you?" Virginia asked, wrinkling her nose. She hated not knowing what was going on even more than I did.

"Oh honey, it's going to be boring as bat-shit. I'll have to fill in forms and probably answer a load of questions. I'm not exactly sure what to expect, but one of the girls at work told me about this happening to her once."

"Damn, it doesn't sound good."

Worry knitted my brows together.

"I know. Sometimes it's about a patient who has been in another accident—which I hope to God it's not."

Mentally I ran through the list of patients I'd been working with. I didn't want anything bad to happen to any one of them.

"I just didn't think I'd be called on so early in my career. I mean, I'm only a casual staff member. I wonder why my boss wasn't called instead?"

Virginia moped. "You're going to miss the best part of the show."

I laughed out loud. "I think I'll survive. You can fill me in later, okay?"

Walking to my car, I wondered if I should have changed into something smarter and more professional than the jeans and t-shirt I was wearing. The thought lasted all of fifteen seconds—the sooner I got there, the sooner I'd know what was going on.

I drove in silence. Usually I played my favorite playlist and sang along, but I was feeling sick in the pit of my stomach and dread filled me the closer I got to the police station. My hands trembled slightly as I parked the car and made my way inside.

Grateful for the air conditioner that offered relief from the outside heat, I announced myself at the reception desk and was told to sit and wait. Fifteen minutes later, Detective Donovan appeared from an office out the back.

"Miss St. John. Thank you for coming so soon." His tone was polite, yet distant. "Sorry for the wait, I was busy on a phone call." Maybe this was just routine for him, but I was virtually biting my nails while I agonized waiting for him.

"No worries." I gave him a half-arsed smile.

"Follow me." His beady eyes were hard and cold.

Goosebumps scattered my skin and I rubbed my arm with one hand to try and warm myself.

A single pot plant against the stark white wall did nothing for the office he led me into, neither did the bright light and cheap furniture. It was only when I saw three pictures on his desk, two of who I assume were his children and one of a woman with the two kids, that I managed a genuine smile. Detective Donovan was human after all. Unless this was someone else's office, of course.

He pointed to the chair closest to the door and I sat down, crossing my legs and arms as I waited. He lifted a single file off his desk and opened it.

"Is Nora Hildegard a patient of yours?"

I breathed in sharply. Of all the people, of the twenty-five patients I had seen over the past year, it had to be Nora?

Too stunned to speak, I nodded.

"Her mother asked for you by name even though you aren't the senior staff member at the rehab center."

"W . . . what happened? Is Nora okay?"

"She's alive, but barely. The poor girl was hit by a car." A fleeting glimpse of sympathy passed through his eyes. "She's in hospital, but she's in a critical condition."

I swear the air conditioner sucked all the oxygen from the room. My head was spinning.

"Whose car was she in this time?"

So help me God, if her father had been drink-driving again.

"She wasn't a passenger. A car ran her over."

My hand flew to my mouth to try and stifle my scream.

"No. Oh, no." I couldn't control the trembling of my hands. Detective Donovan placed a boney hand on my shoulder.

"Her parents were arguing. Her father backed out of the driveway quickly, knocking over the postbox and then the girl. The postbox is destroyed, it took the brunt of the impact, but it still didn't stop the truck from crashing into Nora." Cold fingers dug into my skin as he squeezed my shoulder. "I'm sorry."

"What was she doing outside?"

"Apparently her uncle had just dropped her off. They were at the end of the driveway, about to walk into the house."

"Why was Nora standing there? She shouldn't have been there!" The anger in my voice must have taken Detective Donovan by surprise because his eyes widened. Yeah, I looked tame, but when I was angry I turned into a freaking tiger.

"That's why we need to question you, Miss St. John. As her therapist we need you to make a statement about her previous capabilities so that we can compare it to her current condition."

"Just tell me . . . was her father drunk?"

"Yes. Five times over the legal limit. He was too drunk to stay on the path."

My shoulders slumped forward. Some people would never learn. It was his fault Nora needed therapy in the first place, and now he'd done it again after swearing he'd never drive drunk again.

Shaking with rage, I jumped to my feet. "Can I see Nora?"

"Calm down, Miss St. John. I will allow you to see her, but I suggest you call somebody to accompany you. She doesn't look good." Detective Donovan kept his tone neutral, but I could see anger flash across his face. "I have a daughter Nora's age. I'd hate to lose her to a DUI accident."

Now I understood his solemn expression. If I had to deal with cases like this every day, I'd also have to distance myself in order to stay sane. Right now I had the urge to get into my car and find Nora's dad and uncle and cut their fucking balls off for hurting her. Come to think of it, her mother needed talking too as well.

As if he read my mind, he said in a dry tone, "Mrs. Hildegard is receiving counseling. Both men have been questioned and Mr. Hildegard is sleeping off his hangover in a cell."

People like him should be left to rot behind bars.

"Lucky for him. Cause if I laid my hands on him—"

The detective shrugged, interrupting me. "He doesn't have a scratch on him. Ironic eh?"

I nodded. "Life isn't fair."

Detective Donovan gave me a wry smile and showed me back to the reception of the office and we said our goodbyes. I sat down on the hard wooden chair and immediately fished my phone out of my purse and dialed Enzo's number. After three rings, he answered.

"Bon? Are you okay? Virginia just told me where you are." The concern in his voice nearly made me cry. I bit back the burning in my throat, thankful to hear his calming voice.

"No, I'm not okay. It's Nora—" I choked back the tears in an attempt to appear professional.

"Nora? What happened?"

"Can you pick me up and take me to her? She's in hospital. I'll tell you about it on the way."

In the background I heard Virginia's voice. "Oh my God, did something happen to Nora?"

Enzo must have signaled her to be quiet, because his voice came over the line strong and without hesitation.

"I'm on my way, stay where you are. Drink something while you wait, okay? Tea, water, anything . . . but stay there."

I sobbed out loud, I could always count on his kindness. What would I do without Enzo in my life?

Sending up a little prayer of gratitude to the heavens for him, I wiped my forehead with the back of my hand. "Thank you, Enzo."

* * *

Watching tears fill Bonnie's eyes had a profound effect on me. During my training I'd learned to stay calm and impersonal, but this . . . this was personal as fuck. Bonnie was hurting and I felt so damn helpless as I stood with my arm wrapped around her shoulder as we stared down at Nora's frail little body. She looked like she was being swallowed up by the bed, she looked so tiny.

Her stats were awful. I'd be surprised if she made it through the night with all the internal bleeding she had sustained.

Bonnie held onto her limp little hand, stroking Nora's dark hair off her pale face.

"She looks like an angel," Bonnie murmured, her voice catching in her throat. Her large green eyes met mine, sadness etched in their depths. "Can she hear me, Enzo?"

I nodded. Seeing my girl in so much pain ripped my fucking heart open. "Yeah, talk to her, sweetheart. She can hear you."

Pulling a chair out, I pushed Bonnie down into it so she was closer to the bed. I stood behind her, rubbing circles on her shoulders to soothe her as she spoke to Nora in a gentle voice.

Bonnie paused for a moment and then I heard her sing. She always joked that she was tone deaf and refused to sing except in private. I had heard her sing in the bathroom and she didn't sound half as bad as she though she did, but I never expected her to put her discomfort aside. Stunned, I listened in silence to her sweet voice as she sang one song after another whilst stroking Nora's hand.

This woman.

Her heart was made of pure gold.

She'd be a wonderful mother one day. The kind of mother I wanted for my kids.

I sat in the chair beside her and massaged up and down her spine as Bonnie sang until her voice quivered too much to carry on. Her shoulders slumped forward.

"It's not fair. Why does she have to suffer this much?"

I shrugged, feeling helpless to answer her with a real solution. "Life isn't fair, Bon. It's just the way it is." Her eyes lit up with anger upon hearing my words.

"Where the hell are Nora's guardian angels? They better wake up and take care of her. She can't take much more of this pain," she said, choking on her words. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. Seeing her like this was breaking my fucking heart and I couldn't stand it much longer. I pulled her up into my arms, hugging her tightly.

"Hush, baby. Nora's still alive, yeah? Her angels are taking care of her." I didn't want to tell her that I was surprised the girl was still breathing. The trauma she'd suffered would have killed anyone who didn't have a team of angels on their side.

Bonnie's sobs intensified. "I really hope you are right."

"I'm certain. As long as Nora is breathing there is hope, Bon. And the doctors will do everything they can to help her. You've just gotta have faith, okay?"

"I know . . . I'm trying. But it's so damn hard to watch her suffer like this. I know I'm trained to be able to handle it, but Nora . . . she doesn't deserve this."

Placing my hands on either side of her head, I lifted her tear stained face to mine. My heart ached for her, I wished there was something, anything, I could do to make it better.

Gently, I kissed both her eyelids and then her wet cheeks, trying desperately to stop the tears spilling from her eyes. Her pain was my pain. I could strangle Nora's father for doing this. If only people would realize how their negative behavior could impact and hurt others, what pain they caused not only to the immediate victims, but to everyone else involved.

This was why I wanted to be a doctor. So I could make a difference. Save lives, not companies.

But right at that moment, I was helpless and it cut me to the fucking bone. I hated feeling like there was nothing I could do other than offer words of comfort to my girl. But I had to try, it was the least I could do to try and lighten the burden.

"Coming to London will be good for you. Nora will be in hospital for a while and there isn't much you can do for her at the moment. When you get back, you can work on getting her better again."

My words only made her cry harder. Shit.

"This time it's going to a harder challenge for her," Bonnie sobbed. "God, what if I can't help her to walk again?"

I had no answer, all I could do was to silence her with a kiss. To pour all my love and strength into that kiss and hope it would give her courage to carry on.

"Enzo, you're so sweet. Thank you for being here."

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

I wanted to be Bonnie's everything. Everything she needed.

Her comforter. Her rock. Her lover.

Hers completely.


End file.
